My Darling Beloved Sylvester Is Dieing

I hurt so bad right now. Silly is in the animal hospital where he’s been since Thursday. They don’t know what’s wrong with him, their guess seems to keep changing. I will have some justified anger about that later, but for right now I have to deal with the likely hood that my best friend of more then 12 years is almost certainly dying. Three of the 4 medical professionals did not believe he would make it through the night. 1 doctor largely urged me to euthanise him. I refused. (He did not appear to any of us to be in pain, but both Dr’s think whatever is wrong has progressed to far to cure). The 2nd doctor suggested trying a new drug that has little chance of working, but as any chance is better then none…..

I don’t want to get too much into anger & pointing fingers right now. Suffice it to say, the BELIEF where he is now is that the symptoms we’ve seen for the last couple years that his vet thought were ibd & allergies were actually the beginning of what we’re seeing now. On Thursday, his vet wanted him seen immediately by an internist. The only one in my city had no opening this past week. My vet sent me to a 24 hour hospital 50 miles away that was SUPPOSED to have a 24/7 internist. Someone neglected to tell someone that person was on vacation until Monday. It also concerns me that this hospital while high tech & with nice people is horribly understaffed.

Right now it doesn’t appear we have the time to wait until Monday (or Tuesday to get results of more in depth testing back). Guessing diagnosis have ranged from fatty liver syndrome to liver lymphoma to a brain tumor. There is no question he is near death. The Dr’s fear is that by the time we figure it out, it will be too late if it isn’t already.

I’m just writing this in hope of feeling a teeny bit better. Usually if I hurt, Sylvester makes it better. That’s not an option right now. In fact, he needs me worse then I need him right now. Both times I’ve visited him, he has perked up; in fact dangerously low blood sugar recovered while I was there tonight with no treatment. If he’s still alive, I may try to sleep at the pet hospital tomorrow night.

At any rate, I hurt bad. I just can’t imagine life without my baby. At least the hospital hasn’t called, that’s good news. This all happened pretty sudden. There’s been variations of his usual symptoms for the last few weeks, & a new uti, but as late as Tuesday this past week, his vet & I mutually cancelled his Thursday apt, thinking it wasn’t necessary. The next day he stopped eating completely & I was at her doorstep when she opened on Thursday.

From what I understand, if he makes it through to Monday, we’re looking at a miracle.

Thanks for listening, I hurt very badly & I don’t know what to do with it. I know I can’t kill my best friend. I am praying for a miracle (I was told a dog that they thought was dead on the operating table came back to life tonight), but unfortunately expecting the worst. I just can’t see home without Silly.

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